Although most children were very happy to hear that they could go outside, not all have had the same reaction after six weeks of confinement due to the Covid-19 pandemic. In those days, they have absorbed a lot of information about the coronavirus, they know what it is, how to protect themselves and why protect the elderly, and now that they can go out, many don’t want to, they are afraid.
The fear, which originates in our brain’s “almond” (the amygdala), runs free, whether it is rational and coherent or the not-so-desirable irrational. It is an undeniable moment of adversity and, among others, we will briefly recall the classics, starting with the great Latin poet Horace:
Adversity has the gift of awakening talents that would have remained dormant in comfort.
If we look in the dictionary, we will find that fear, among other meanings, is a feeling of anguish caused by the presence of a real or imaginary danger, present, future or even past, or also, that of a feeling of distrust that drives one to believe that an event contrary to what is desired will occur. As a primary emotion, derived from the natural aversion to risk and the threat of the unknown, adversity, the uncontrollable and unpredictable, fear preys on humans as a warning of alert and survival. Returning to the classics, we will remember Seneca:
There is no one less fortunate than the man whom adversity forgets, for he has no opportunity to test himself.
The threat can be perceived towards life, towards one’s own safety, self-esteem or self-concept. When we manage fear in a functional way, it helps us in making decisions about our actions and knowing how prepared we are to face them, but a perception of high fear or with duration in time can generate states of anxiety, sadness, frustration and rage.
Facing adversity and controlling fear
Showing psychological strength and courage is also being aware of our fear and vulnerability, developing the ability to accept adverse and difficult situations, moving with the flexibility of a reed, with calm and hope, carrying out an intelligent management of our emotions.
Let us keep in mind that adults are “the teachers” of our children, they observe us and learn attentively. Let’s practice self-control, modulating our reactions, let’s know and accept our emotions, removing irrational thoughts and panic behaviors. In the most critical moments, let us keep in mind our sense of life as well as our purposes, let us remember the legacy that Viktor Frankl left us in his life experience:
There is nothing in the world that empowers a person so much to overcome external difficulties and internal limitations as the awareness of having a task in life.
Mental openness, curiosity and creativity with a change of perspective to accept what is happening around us and also accept uncertainty, as Seneca said:
In adversity it is often advisable to take a daring path.
Important to know how to give and receive help. Being strong does not consist of “enduring and resigning oneself”. Valuable help is that which is offered without overwhelming or judging.
Thanks to this adverse circumstance, we have a great opportunity to deepen contact and the relationship with our children, recognize ourselves and get to know them much better and be able to transmit values and principles, from solidarity, through creativity, generosity, empathy, flexibility, enjoyment and reconnection with simple things.
The core to be resilient ourselves and teach it to minors with meaningful learning always begins with the maxim of knowing oneself, knowing how to adapt to changes, knowing how to accept and not give up, being aware that we all suffer and relying on our strengths. Let’s facilitate the task of knowing our children more objectively.
More than in fear, which even with the black humor of Woody Allen:
Fear is my most faithful companion, he has never cheated on me to go with another.
it does not stop alerting us, we want to focus on happiness, whose celebration was curiously on March 20, and more specifically as defined by Aristotle:
Happiness is an activity of the soul and is only achieved when we are capable of doing something beautiful or good.
Detecting the needs of children to offer them the best help
In these days of a state of alarm, there have been so many people in various fields and professions, many anonymous, others known, who have done such beautiful and good acts for which we are recognized and grateful. And we from díde also want to contribute something good to the seed of our future, our children, therefore, the díde application has been made available to educational counselors and families.
For families, with the dide family version, it will be free until May 31, and for professionals with the dide education and dide health versions, until August 31.
Through díde, (online platform for early detection of difficulties in children from two to eighteen years old, with methodology by observation without the intervention of minors), we can find signs that detect among others:
- Anxious mood
- Low mood
- Low tolerance to frustration
- Disobedience
- Difficulty in managing anger
- Dominant and egocentric behavior
- Negativistic and defiant behavior
- School maladjustment
- Family maladjustment
- Situations of school bullying
- Situations of cyberbullying
and so many other difficulties, up to thirty-five that one day it could all start in a fear, in an insecurity, in an uncertainty, in a demand from the child not to fail before expectations and that led to a decrease in self-esteem among other inconveniences.
In a simple and non-invasive way for our children, parents and other educators can turn the current confinement situation into an opportunity and take advantage of the greater time spent with minors by passing the online questionnaires to obtain a complete profile of the needs and status of minors in all their areas.
Thanks to the knowledge and observation of the parents of the minor as well as that of the teachers, tutor and counselor of the same, always following the same observation methodology, it is possible to advance processes in this moment of “stop” and know how to support and care for the minor in their diversity, facing what they need for their greater well-being. Like other fronts in human existence, we have to start with the cornerstone of knowing them as they are and how they are.
Let’s participate in the Butterfly Effect: “The simple flutter of a butterfly can change the world.”
